Ferris Wheel

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Kanashimi no mukou kishi ni
Hohoemi ga aru toiu yo

Kanashimi no mukou kishi ni
Hohoemi ga aru to iu yo
Tadori tsuku sono saki ni wa
Nani ga bokura wo matteru?

Nigeru tame ja naku yume ou tame ni
Tabi ni deta hazusa tooi natsu no ano hi

Ashita sae mieta nara tame iki mo nai kedo
Nagare ni sakarau fune no you ni
Ima wa mae he susume

Kurushimi no tsukita basho ni
Shiawase ga matsu toiu yo
Boku wa mada sagashite iru
Kisetsu hazure no himawari

Kobushi nigirishime asahi wo mateba
Akai tsume ato ni namida kirari ochiru

Kodoku ni mo nareta nara
Tsuki akari tayori ni
Hane naki tsubasa de tobi tatou
Motto mae he susume

Amagumo ga kireta nara
Nureta michi kagayaku
Yami dake ga oshiete kureru
Tsuyoi tsuyoi hikari
Tsuyoku mae he susume

i just finished watching 超级星光大道第三季 (the 1st episode) on youtube! tat's the problem with no scv at hm -.-''' haha..but the good news is..woo ooh~ Singapore contestants, Sugianto from 绝对Superstar 1 and Yvonne from 校园Superstar 1 made it through the 1st round! 加油加油! =)

exams r realli coming le! in just less than a month! arrg! >.<
stressed stressed stressed!

woo ooh~ back home!

kinda bored stuck at hm alone..wanna go out but duno where to go -.- but luckily hav dearie py's company thru sms-ing me! *winks* so i'm not tat bored after all! =P

i am staying at home cos i wanna 'sun' the clothes that i washed on fri..including my 2 sweaters! haha..hopefully the 2 sweaters will b totally dry before mum comes back tonite! otherwise she confirm nag at me for washing 2 sweaters at 1 time! haha..luckily today hav sun..though not veri strong sun..-.- haha..hav to make sure that the clothes dry b4 mum they all come back tonite with loads of clothes to b washed! nxt time when i hav ny own home..mayb i shld consider to get a dryer machine (or watever it's called!) so that i wun b worried if it keeps raining! wahaha..i tink too far le la -.-

haha..went imm with xiao shu & family yesterday for dinner! went Pepper Lunch for dinner! haha..it's my 1st time dere! haha..the food is not bad..i like the service of a lady there..so patient! good service rules mans! =D but after eating, i stink mans! haha..the smell is even much more overpowering as compared to the food court in sch which i thought was veri veri jia lat le! haha..went up to level 3 to look for furniture after dinner..xiao shu they all preparing for their new homes..realised that i was wrong in the past! furnitures which serves the same purposes do differs! haha..i always felt that a sofa is just a sofa, w/o realli differentiating the differences in the different sofa sold in the various stores! haha..we went around looking for kitchen sinks and basin taps! dere's like so so mani designs for them! was totally amazed by the various designs a tap can have! haha..some look so ordinary but there's some which realli do super sophisticated! haha..nice nice! =D

went back ah ma house to tuck the 2 kids to bed early so that we (my uncle, aunt & me) can go for a late-night movie! haha..we left house around 11pm like tat ..went JP to catch 'semi-pro'..the lame funni basketball comedy! haha..intially tot it wuld b just a stupid funni show..but it turns out that i enjoyed it quite alot! haha..super damn funni! a superb way to cheer myself up frm the moodiness i had been suffering in the past few days! =) but some of the parts realli realli veri veri veri lame -.- haha..
tks to them for the dinner and movies and popcorn and drinks! haha..i realli did enjoyed myself and it's the 1st ting that made me not so pissed off for being nable to join them all in malaysia! the tv cum scv at ah ma house is the next big reason! =P haha..i'm such a tv addict! =P

anyways my exams r coming le..dreads this mans! >.<
business stats: 25 april (fri)
commerical law: 2 may (fri)
prices & markets: 6 may (tue)
mgmt acc & business: 9 may (fri)

JIU MING AR~ haha..celine's mid-yr exmas coming too! abt the same time as my exams lehs! omg! wat if later they ask for more tution lessons? wa! den i dun need to study for my exams le lo! haha..

better make sure i start revising soon! gogogogogogogo~

u r coming back soon..how am i supposed to tell u wat i hav done? =S
pls dun b disappointed in me! it's realli a veri hard decision to make!

ok..i decided not to go for it le..i've thought thru for it le..and hopefully u will accept wat i hav chosen to do..hope u'll understand why i am doin it this way..
pls dun be mad at me..i'm sorry if i had disappoint u..once again..
i wonder wat ur reaction will b when u hear this when u're back frm m'sia..

i hate doin housework! realised it's not an easy task! haha..i'm left alone in SG while dad, mum, bro and all my other aunts N cousins r in m'sia! i wanted to go so badly! when i realised that i having my commercial law lecture today (the onli reason to y i am not in genting right now!) wa totally sians mans! did thought of pon-ing today's lect de..but decided not to..but if it's business stats lect..i confirm pon de!! =P haha..

anyways staying overnite at my (dad's side) ah ma house last nite N tonite..dad was worried for me to stay alone at hm at nite..haha..luckily still hav 2 little cousins to pei me..haha..hav scv at ah ma house! woo ooh! dere's a tv in the room i am sleeping in too! so so shuang! haha..how i wished this can happen in my own room too! me and my wishful thoughts! -.-''' haha..

gonna go prepare to go out to hav dinner with xiao shu (my uncle) they all le..haha..another nite of hogging tv for me tonite! wee~! =)

so funni that things r happening this way! =P

wat's the point of me saying so much when u keep insisting that u wished that i'll do things your way..wat's the point of me trying to explain to u why your way doesnt work out when u keep insisting that your way is the best way for me..wat's the point of us talking when in the end we will just end up quarrelling? >.<

and it's just over some dumb minor thing..u tink it's realli worth it to make things so ugly til it end up this way?

u tink i wish for things to turn out like tat? no i didnt wan to..if onli u can tink abt the explaination that i had given u..if onli u can try to absorb wat i had said and understand things frm my point of view..

i've tried to talk to u abt this nicely..like how i did just now..but wat u did in the end? u started saying things til such a way that made me damn guilty if dun do things your way..do u know that i'm bloodly pissed with u at tat pt of time? are u trying to make use of the reverse psychology method to make me conform to your way of handling this incident? even dad is more understanding towards my point of view..

i juz dun understand why u r so persistent! the thing is tat i am the one who's doing it all over again..not u! u tink it's so easy? u tink things will realli turn out to b fine if i do it according to ur plan? u tink i realli will b able to get a better grade this time round? i'm not sure myself..how can u b so sure? >.<

last words: if realli in the end i went to apply for it..i will doing it bcos of you..and..it's not bcos i wanted it..

so mani things happened recently..ann gu's kidney failure + erina's shocking extortion of money case in sch...and this incident btw me & my mum..headache mans! i dun hav the strength to settle everything at a go =(

i deliberately didnt tell my incident to anyone in my ah ma house (my aunts etc) cos they all hav enuff things to wry in the mind le..i dun wanna wry them even more..i did felt like talking to them to discuss abt this de but i controlled this urge..i dun wanna add on to the load that they already had in their minds..

tmr shld b the day i will decide..rmb..if i realli do it..i did it for you..not me..

FUCK LA!

U WAN TO COMPARE SO MUCH DEN GO BE THEIR MUM LA! LEAVE ME ALONE!
I HATE TO COMPARED WITH OTHERS LIKE THAT!

U TINK I WANNA THINGS TO B TURNED OUT LIKE TAT? I DIDNT WAN TO IT TO BE LIKT TAT DE BUT IT'S NOT WITHIN MY CONTROL! AND INSTEAD OF LEAVING TAT UNHAPPY DISAPPOINTING INCIDENT ASIDE..U KEEP EMPHASING & MENTIONING IT EVERY NOW AND DEN..DO U KNOW TAT EVERYTIME I HEAR U SAYING THAT..I FEEL SO ANGRY WITH MYSELF INSIDE FOR BEING NOT ABLE TO FULFILL TO UP U HAD EXPECTED ME TO! IT'S EQUALLY HURTING TOO!

CAN U JUST RESPECT MY WISHES AND WAT I WANNA DO? THIS KIND OF THING IS NOT COS U ASKED ME TO DO DEN I GO DO DE! I HAV TOTALLY NO MORE INTEREST IN STUDYING FOR THE STUPID CHEMISTRY ONCE AGAIN! IT'S NOT EASY AS U HAD PRESUMED IT TO BE! SO EASY DEN U GO STUDY N TAKE THE EXAM URSELF LA!

HATE IT WHEN U ALWAYS SAY THAT SIM IS NOT RECOGNISED AND Y AM I STILL STUDYING IN THAT SCH! YES I AGREE THAT SIM'S CERT IS NOT AS RECOGNISED AS THOSE LOCAL UNI DE..BUT IT'S RECOGNISED DE OK!!!!!!!!!!!! U TINK I WANNA GO SIM IF I WAS GIVEN THE CHOICE TO GO EITHER NTU OR NUS? U TINK I AM SO CRAZY TO MAKE U ALL THE SPEND SO MUCH ON THE SIM FEES AS COMPARED TO THE SCH FEES IN NTU OR NUS IF I WAS GIVEN THE CHOICE?
BUT AM I GIVEN A CHOICE? NO DOUNT THAT MY 'A's RESULTS SUCKS BUT IS IT TOO LATE TO SAY THAT I SHLD HAV WORKED HARDER N GET BETTER RESULTS IN THE PAST? IT'S JUST TOO LATE LE!

AND REALLI..I DUN LIKE TO B COMPARED WITH THE OTHERS! WAT'S WITH U WHEN SAYING WHY MY OTHER FRENS MANAGED TO GO INTO THE LOCAL UNI AND I CANT..WAT'S WITH U WHEN U KEEP SAYING THAT IT'S A TOTAL EMBARSSMENT WHEN A JC STUDENT LIKE ME CANT GO INTO A LOCAL UNI WHILE POLY STUDENTS LIKE THEM CAN DO SO?

WHY R U LIKE TAT?

GIVE ME A BREAK MANS!

superbly angry now..it feels super hurt inside me too..

I AM NOT A PERFECT PERSON! NOBODY'S PERFECT!
NOR I AM THE PERSON WHOM U WISHED ME TO BE! I'M NOT YOUR PUPPET!

WA! tests over!

had the ridiculous commerical law paper this morn..and it's like FREAKING OMG la! i got a sudden shock when i turned over and saw qn 2 of the paper..felt so cheated! wat i had spent hrs earlier last midnight to memorise the entire part of the statutory interpretation part is all wasted! to tink i still wrote out the entire thing for 3 times! it's a full A4 size essay lehs! waste my time -.- to tink i still forgo my current craze (the channel 8 9pm show every weekdays) just to make sure that i can memorise watever which i thought that is required for the paper this morning! arrg! beware: nv to trust ur lecturers 100%! especially in predicting qns for tests or exams! i'm not blaming mr yeo for giving us the wrong hint for the essay-type qn for today's test despite feeling so confident in it..it's my fault for being too complacent & totally believe him that onli that and nothing else will come out..but wat i am most pissed off with is it..I DID READ THE PART THAT CAME OUT FOR TODAY'S QN WHEN REVISING! BUT THE TING IS THAT I ONLI READ IT ONE TIME & NV GO MEMORISE IT COS I PRESUMED THAT IT'S NOT COMING OUT! arrg! angry with myself mans! >.<
anyways..tink i'll b flopping my law test..or actually i shld say that i KNOW that i'll b flopping it..sians! >.<''' hopefully the end yr semester exam can help me pull up my final grade.it's scary when the teacher keeps saying that the failure rates for this subject is exceptionally high as compared to other subjects! I DUN WANNA BE PART OF THIS PERCENTAGE OF PPL!

went shopping at orchard with peiyin today after sch! it's like been kinda long since we 2 went out on a shopping trip..not counting those occassional visits to JP or IMM after lessons! haha..went taka to get her sweater..but so unlucky! both the designs she wanted dun hav her sizes le! so sad! tot she wuld b able to get her long-long-awaited sweater today..hais! nvm! we'll go other place to look for ur sweaters ger! haha..i ate my all-time-fav & once-in-a-while indulgence -- cinnamon sugar pretzels at Auntie Anne's! niceeee! =D lucky dere's no auntie anne's outlet near my place..or i cfm get addicted to it..like i'm addicted to bubble tea! haha..speaking of bubble tea! i hav not drank it for 1 week before i had a cup on wed! haha..so hard to fiht off the temptation of drinking whenever i pass by the shop! haha..

after taka..we walked to far east for MORE shopping! haha..so mani clothes & shoes & bags that r so nice! but i am saving money! haha..so cannot anyhow spend! haha..saw a white pair of heels in URS..nice! shall tink abt it if i shld buy it not..cos heels also not everytime wear de..i dun wanna waste money..haha..realised it's true that ribbons r the current trend now..u see it everywhere..on collar-button shirts, on dresses and even on shoes! the boyfriend shirt (as how py had described to me) is still in the trend too! those long long button formal shirts for ladies! u see it everywhere! haha..and wat we realised after spending our entire afternoon in far east is that DIFFERENT STORES QUOTE DIFFERENT PRICES FOR THE SAME PIECE OF ITEM! realli lo..was kinda shocked by this at 1st! haha..so nxt time muz rmb to walk finish the whole shopping centre b4 deciding to buy the thing that u wan! haha..i saw a super bright YELLOW slippers in M)phosis..so attracted to it! so tempted to buy! but it's realli a spurge if i realli do buy it..haha..peiyin offered to paint one for me! haha..I AM LIKE SO OBSESSED WITH YELLOW! haha..saw a yellow & grey cardigan too which i find it nice =P haha..

speaking of cardigans! peiyin managed to buy the long long cardigans that she wanted to buy..the shop we went to is like so danm small with so many ppl..haha..though the cardigans r hung properly, i still feel that the whole store is in a big mess! haha..the 3 salesgirls r like super busy la..i got kinda pissed off with this lady who thought that she's the onli person in the shop! her attitude towards the salesgirls is KNS also la..does she think that the salesppl r obliged to serve her in the way she wants? summore she is just 1 of the many customers in the store at that pt of time..wa! tink if i were the 1 of the salesgirls serving to her needs..i will cfm spit vuglars at her when she leaves the shop..i dun like the slang in the voice which makes her feel even haughty! -.-''' i wonder how those salesgirls managed to tolerate this kind if customer's attitude..it's realli not easy lo! not a easy job to serve ppl! no wonder ppl says that it's a blessing to b served..=)

went to hav ramen for dinner..at level 5 of far east..introduced by peiyin's fren (liane)..haha..the ramen there is not bad! haha..summore it's cheap! foodcourt prices! and their ramen DUN taste like maggi mee to me! haha..nice! can recognise the place by the photos they stuck at their entrance..there's a pic of the manager of the shop (i tink) with jamie teo & desmond koh..there's another pic of her with joanne peh too!
"peiyin, let's go dere again nxt time! i wanna try the other ramens that they offer!"
"and.......i wanna drink tat milk tea that so mani ppl had tempted me with!" haha..=P

wanted to leave after dinner to avoid the jams (both human & traffic) but decided to go walk at wisma cos we r too full le! hav to digest by MORE shopping! haha..actually is me who wanted to go to this shop in wisma to see clothes! i like the clothes there! but i find it kinda ex..too ex for me..haha..so i onli can see see look look! haha..went to FACE SHOP to see nail polish and guess wat! i finally found my dark blue shade of nail polish! i hav been looking for this shade for quite some time le! haha..in the end..i got tempted and bought that dark blue shade & another glitter de & their nail polish remover! i'm such an impluse buyer! haha..see le like den buy..also nv tink if i will use it not -.-''' haha..anyways i managed to meet xiao yi (aunt cecilia) at wisma! so 'qiao'! she's shopping dere too with her fren! haha..accompanied peiyin to mrt station b4 joining xiao yi again..haha..she treated us to gelato ice-cream! i was not supposed to eat de lo..haha..but i still cant fight the resistance and took few bites! NICE! the shop at shaw house dere! haha..tink the ice-cream is ex de lo..haha..

took bus back to ah ma house with xiao yi after showing her fren to way out of the carpark..luckily the bus wasnt packed N there's no jam on the roads! =)

wat a fruitful day spent! i am so tired now with aching feet but i'm satisified to spend my day with the ppl i loved so much and it's realli a miracle tat how i had forgotten the disappointment and anger i had in me this morning!

and now..i am waiting for my remaining test results to b out..while praying hard & hoping that it wuldnt b that bad as i had expected! (i wish!)

finally! tonite is the nite when i dun hav to share my bed with my notes..i do not hav to slp with my lights on cos i dun hav to read as much notes as i can b4 i drift off to slp w/o knowing..i am gonna to hav a good nite rest til the next morning! =)

sch life for me is changing for the better..realised i had the wrong 1st impressions of some ppl in my class which made them look so hostile in the beginning..i am glad and blessed that things r starting to change for the better...=)

DISAPPOINTED! totally disappointed! i onli managed to get a CR grade [60-70%] for my business stats mcq test =( which i didnt expect at all! once again it's a proven fact that i realli do SUCKED at mcq qns! >.<

'ann gu' (my uncle) is in hopital due to kidney failure..so sad for him..he's still considered young lor..how on earth did he manage to get this irriatating illness! sucks mans!

i'll b goin down after sch tmr to visit him for the 1st time since he was admitted to the hospital..duno y i feel kinda scared of seeing him..i scare i'll say the wrong tings..i'm scared that i wuldnt noe how to comfort him..i dun wanna see him in the state he is now..

BUT..i will not hide..i will not run away! i wanna be the 开心果 (the role of me when i am in my ah ma house) to cheer him up..dun wanna let him hav any upset or negative thoughts..wanna let him know that we r all standing by him..

the least i can do now is to pray hard that dere'll b someone in our family will b the suitable person to do a kidney transplant for him..pray hard that his body will b strong enuff to undergo the operation..

''ah gu..hav faith! be strong! never give up! we r all by ur side supporting u!"

i can feel the closeness of my big family..and it's not onli after this incident..i hav always felt it this way..this incident proven the fact once again..i love them all!

frm now on..i hav to stop myself frm taking stuff which r HIGH in sugar content! i guess it's onli when u experienced similar things den u'll worry for urself! my bubble tea! my choc! my sweets! my gummies! NO MORE! 1st thing to do..i hav to STOP myself frm falling into the temptation to drink my all-time favourite bubble tea when i walked past a shop selling that..i suddenly realised that i am having bubble tea either EVERYDAY or ONCE IN 2 DAYS for the past few weeks! omg! slowly i shall curb myself..it's not that i will not drink it anymore..i will juz try control myself frm not drinking it so often..jiayou!

hey zhong,

HAPPY 13TH BIRTHDAY! =)

to my dear bro..though we always quarrel over little things (wat i said is for ur own good =P)..i do realli appreciate u & thank god for having u as my little bro..hav a great day today! enjoyS~ (^-^)v

wee! nice movie! worth watching! worth waiting! haha..''L'' is super charming (at least to me!) haha..his strange antics in the movie made him so popular..i wuldnt be surprised if i suddenly start seeing ppl on the streets imitating him with the super thick black eye-liner + the way he walks n jumps (super funni when he alighted the airplane in the movie!) + the way he holds his things + not forgetting the super funni way he typed the keyboard..haha..ok i admit that it wuld b strange if a guy i knew consume so so much sweet stuff all day! the sweets & choc goodies in the show look so damn appealing N tempting! i wan i wan! someone get it for me frm japan! =P

"L" is like super clever in the show..apparently he said that sugar content will keep the brain frm working efficiently N effectively! wonder how true this is! haha..like tat den i'll make sure that i take a huge bag of gummy sweets b4 any exams ! haha..

i like this pic! =P

the baddies in the show! >.<

the little ger! duno y i feel tat she look s abit like the campus superstar ger (zhengning)

haha..went with py to watch the show at JP today after sch..haha..tks for accompanying me ger! =) haha..amazingly on a weekday noon, dere's considered mani ppl watch movie..and frm wat i see..they're mostly students! lower sec, upper sec, jc sudents N even pri sch students! whoa! they muz b rich mans! esp the pri sch kids..rmb my pri sch days, i hav to save my pocket money in order to get the pretty pretty pens or correction tape or notebook frm my sch's bookshop..sumting i rmb veri clearly is that..in the olden times, it seems like its's the norm to get different colours of the same brand & type of pens..i rmb i hav like 6 pilot G-2 pens back then..all in different colours! now come to tink abt it, i feel so foolish to b wasting my money on these pens back then! haha...

anyways went to eat the long-not-eaten long john silvers..and i realised..wa! prices r realli rising like crazy for everything now! OMG mans! can u imagine how much higher these prices will go? wat will happen to those ppl who cant afford for all these increase in prices? i was saying this to celine during tuition today "y do u hav to take so much tissue paper at a time juz to clean ur little nose? hav u thought that they may b ppl in a part of this world who cant even afford to use tissue paper?"

i guess it's true..realli true..so we hav to cherish watever we hav now..we shldnt b greedy and ask for more than required! (but on another hand..who wuldnt ask for more? i admit i do all ask for more most of the time!) but i realli dun see the point of spending so much for sumting which can b bought at a lower price (of cos considering the quality of the product la!) juz dun understand y ppl can spend hundreds on clothes or bags or even shoes? omg! i find spending so much on shoes is totally not worth! haha..it's like taking the money N stepping on the ground! *heart-ache* haha..
to everyone: this is onli my point of view..so pls do not b offended by my words yea? =)

the mgmt acct test i had today was quite alrite..not as tough as i expected it to b! cos i was like expecting them to ask super alot of theory qns..like wat it happened last sem with the IA test! but i DUNO HOW TO DO QN4 for today's test! arrg! dere goes my distinction grade! =( though qn 4 is like onli 3 marks..but this test today made each single mark a SUPER big percentage of the entire grade cos the total marks of today's test is onli 18marks! but i am glad that i wasnt trivked by the 5th qn in the test! haha..stupid mans! so tricky! wonder how mani ppl wil b tricked by that! lols...summore i finished the paper on time la! no time for me to check! haha..50 mins + 5 mins reading time for 6 qns! mayb is bcos i did too slowly! py didnt even hav time to sip the bubble tea that she brought in! haha..

speaking abt bubble tea! sumting realli unlucky happened during the prices & markets lecture on tue..OMG la! py's bubble tea which was placed on the table spilled cos a ger in front knocked the cup with her bag..it's not her fault! no one's fault! haha..but i was totally shocked la! haha..the lesson had already started..apparently the ger arrived late and wanna sit down at her seat as quick as possible to avoid disturbing the rest..and the nxt thing i knew..the bubble tea on the table was knocked over! the lousy quality of the cup made the entire incident even worst! the cover came off totally and the drink was like spilling everywhere..i freaked out but i did not scream hor! haha..the entire incident was such a big woo-ha..tat even the lecturer stopped his lesson when he saw this incident..haha..when py N i were trying to stop the drink frm flowing woth thw limited amt of tissue we had..this guy frm our class got the whole box of tissue paper which was provided for the class for breaktime snacks to us..totally impressed by his quick-tinkin of using the tissue paper there & the gesture of his to help us -- according to our lecturer "the ladies in distress"! haha..realli changed the impression of that guy in me..haha..i used to tink that he's kinda weird N gay (i'm realli sry for being so frank =P) de..USED to la..haha..now it's different..realised that he's a guy with a reasonable amt of EQ to b able to get along so well with almost all our lectueres N the ppl around him! he's helpful too! tks mans for the tissue! =) haha..this shows tat how a little single ting can change a person's impression in us! haha..dun u agree? =)

another dreadful test is coming! commerical law! OMG! >.<

i can feel ur concern..i realli do..i didnt do this on purpose..realli didnt!
有些话好难说出口....三个字..对不起! =_(
i promise not to do this again!

"L" looks so sorrow as how i feel now..
it was the 1st time i nearly wept in public with nobody i know around me..

arrg! stressed!! >.<'''
i wanna get all the dreadful tests over as soon as i can!
i wish -.-'''

looking forward to this wed! *winks*